By Marie-Antoinette Issa.
If you’re planning to eat like an Italian (and who wouldn’t want to), there are some unwritten rules you absolutely cannot break - no matter how badly you want to sprinkle cheese on your seafood pasta.
To help navigate the deliciously carby yet complex maze that is Italian dining, we tapped into the wisdom of Mattia Senesi, Chef at Tessuto - a man with a passion, plan of attack and plate of past for every occasion.
So, before you get your noodles in a knot on the right way to tuck into a bowl of Bolognese or serve up a slice of (obviously pineapple-free) pizza, we suggest following this guide to Italian eating etiquette to avoid any embarrassing food faux pas.
Rome wasn’t built (or eaten) in a day:
When it comes to Italian meals, an important starting point is that slow and steady wins the race. For a nation known for embracing La Dolce Vita, the love for long and leisurely lunches is strong. Here, it’s not simply about eating to live but living to eat and there’s a very specific sequence to doing it well.
Antipasto (starter) comes first, followed by Primo (first course, usually pasta or rice), then Secondo (main course, meat or fish) with a Contorno (side, like salad or vegetables) and finally, Dolce (dessert).
No, you can’t swap that order just because you’re feeling rebellious. After dessert, it’s time for a quick Caffe (coffee) and possibly a digestive, like a homemade Limoncello, to seal the deal.
Pasta la vista baby:
Breaking bread may be a peace offering, but breaking pasta before you cook it? Mamma mia...don’t do that!
Mattia is pretty firm on this: "It is a sin to break spaghetti,” he says. Skip the spoon! "Most Italians will eat pasta with just a fork and the plate to assist with the last little bits.”
Chicken in pasta is also a sign of fowl play! In fact, according to Mattia, this culinary faux pas will raise eyebrows faster than you can say "pollo alla cacciatora”.
"It’s unheard of,” Mattia emphasises. "You keep the chicken for its rightful place - on its own plate, with sides, not mixed in with your spaghetti.”
As for piling Parmesan on your pasta, cheese on seafood is a pairing best avoided. "It’s all about the flavour combination and the fact that cheese is hard to digest,” says Mattia.
A pizza the action:
When it comes to pizza, there are a few golden rules and breaking them will have Italians shaking their heads in disbelief. First: no pineapple on pizza. Ever! The same goes for chicken, ham and a meat-lovers pizza in general.
"That’s not pizza, that’s a crime against the culinary gods,” Mattia says.
When it comes to how you eat pizza, Italians keep it simple. "The best way to eat pizza is with your hands. Take a slice, fold it in half with one hand and fold the front corner over itself (if it’s Napolitana pizza) and away you go.”
Simple. No knives, no forks - just hands-on dining, literally.
Breaking bread, but not rules:
Bread in Italy is serious business. Whether you’re dunking it in olive oil or having it with a hearty stew, bread is best enjoyed eaten with your meal - and not merely as an appetiser.
"If you want to be confused for a real Italian, always use your bread to soak up the last bit of sauce on your plate,” says Mattia, referring to the ritual affectionately referred to as "Scarpetta” - or sopping up all the sauce left on your plate.
As Mattia puts it: "Bread, like pasta, is also life,” and it should be respected as such.
Wake up and smell the coffee (but quit the cappuccino after lunch):
Italians love their coffee, but there’s a very specific time and place for every type.
Ordering an ‘espresso’ is an excellent way to start the day. To really make like a local, just ask for un caffe and enjoy it standing at the bar rather than wandering the streets with a takeaway cup. Before sipping, a small glass of water cleanses the palate, ensuring every drop of coffee is savoured.
If you ask for ‘latte’, you’ll just get a glass of milk! Instead, order a caffe latte and if you’re after a little milk, a caffe macchiato - an espresso lightly ‘stained’ with milk - is the proper choice.
Finally, if you’re thinking about ordering a cappuccino after 11 am, think again. That’s breakfast coffee and you’ll get some seriously judgmental looks if you try to sneak it in post-lunch.
According to Mattia, it’s all about digestion. "It’s tradition,” he says, "and Italians know the importance of proper digestion.” So, save the frothy milk for your morning espresso kick and stick to a macchiato or espresso after lunch.
Raising a glass:
"Beer and wine belong on the dinner table, but not cocktails and spirits,” says Mattia. When it comes to drinking, bubbles (always sans ice) are meant to be sipped, never rushed and appreciated alongside food.”
In contrast, a Spritz - whether Aperol or Campari - is strictly for aperitivo, a pre-dinner delight, not something to accompany a meal. These small yet significant customs are designed to elevate every sip into something truly special.
Sharing is not caring (unless it’s antipasto):
Unlike in other parts of the world where sharing is often encouraged, if you're at an Italian table, don't even think about splitting a pizza, your pasta dish or the bill with someone else.
When it comes to dessert? No shame in ordering your own. Sharing gelato, however, is totally allowed - but only if you’re meeting a friend specifically for gelato.
The golden rules:
Ready to eat like a true Italian? Here are Mattia’s top three rules you cannot ignore:
•Avoid eating where all the tourists eat.
•You have extra virgin olive oil with bread, not butter.
•Finally, wish everyone happy eating at the beginning of your meal by saying Buon Appetito, "because Italians are all about enjoying the meal together,” says Mattia
